Attention everybody who hasn’t discovered internet porn, or wants to see some nudity & sex in a real storytelling context (sorry, internet porn), some guy has created a search engine for all of the movies available via Netflix that contain the MPAA’s greatest enemy. The site is aptly titled “Bateflix” and says it will help you find “the best porn on Netflix.”
According to Bateflix, they have 6,411 movies in the database. There are rated on a scale from X to XXX, depending on their level of sexual explicitness.
Users can search the database by filtering for genre, category (or sexual activity), year, MPAA rating, user rating within Netflix, and of course DVD-vs-streaming availability. So, if I wanted a fantasy film from 2000-2009 featuring accidental nudity, I currently only have one option: The Piano Tower of Earthquakes, a Not-Rated 2006 film with a 2.8 average rating on Netflix. “After murdering an opera singer onstage, the sinister Dr. Droz absconds with her corpse and creates a performance starring her reanimated body,” says the synopsis. In this case, I’m probably better off taking my chances on the interwebs.
But if I generalize my search to any film available through Netflix instant with a threesome – I get a lot more options. This is just the XXX categorized results:
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After you find what you’re looking for, you can even write a nudity review. Bateflix also features a random movie generator, if you’re not being too picky.
Of course, using a Netflix search as a porn search has its problems. For one, watching an entire movie like “Black Snake Moan” for the nudity/sex is like reading Catcher In The Rye to hear someone say some bad words. There are definitely better options. Plus, a random search just pulled up films like 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days as well as Irreversible – both of which contain nudity, but calling it “porn” might be a little strange for some people.
Then again, if you have to watch a movie with your parents, you could use Bateflix to screen out the ones that might make things a bit uncomfortable.
Oh well, let’s just file it under the “so that exists” department and move on.