True story: I stopped eating a Burger King over four years ago following a peculiar incident with one of the company’s drive-thru employees. Upon stopping at the first window to pay for my order, I was greeted by a woman who appeared to be having an extremely bad day. Being the kind and considerate individual that I am (shut up), I asked the lady how she was doing. What I received in response was a diatribe about the company’s seemingly archaic break schedule, which she felt was a little strict considering she was currently on her period. Yes, I learned all about a perfect stranger’s menstrual cycle on that fateful day, which has kind of soured me on the whole Burger King experience. No offense to the company intended.

Today adds yet another strike against the restaurant and their very unusual employees. According to the website Clevescene, an area Burger King employee thought it would be impossibly hilarious to post a picture of himself standing in two bins of lettuce to the popular website 4Chan. The caption positioned beneath the photograph read, “This is the lettuce you eat at Burger King.” Given that fast food lettuce already looks and feels like someone rubbed it vigorously against their unclothed backside for hours on end, this image doesn’t exactly get my mouth watering for a Burger King sandwich.

Outraged, several users on 4Chan decided to take action against the troublemaker. Using GPS information located within the picture file, the offended folks managed to pinpoint Mayfield Heights, Ohio as the location of this alleged food-soiling incident. The impromptu investigation apparently only took 15 minutes to complete. Ah, the endless marvels of technology and the fools who think they’re doing things online with anonymity.

Clevescene reportedly called the restaurant to see if any steps were being taken to oust the loser who defiled the company’s beloved lettuce supply. “Whoever this is is getting fired,” the breakfast shift manager explained. “And whoever the manager was at the time will be fired, too.”

Burger King’s corporate offices have weighed in on the subject, as well, issuing the following statement to FOX8 Cleveland. “We are aware of the photo that was allegedly posted by an employee at a BURGER KING® restaurant in Ohio and are taking the issue very seriously,” the company said. “Food safety is a top priority for BURGER KING® restaurants and the company has strict policies regarding its food handling procedures. We are investigating the matter and will take appropriate action as necessary.”

Unless that “appropriate action” is kicking the freak onto the sidewalk, I’d say my time with Burger King is officially over and done with. Besides, I can’t seem to disassociate the restaurant with that poor woman’s menstrual cycle. Some things simply cannot be forgotten or forgiven.

Then again, I guess I asked for it.