Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
I’m safely on the surface of Mars. GALE CRATER I AM IN YOU!!! #MSL
OH “The nerds just took gold in the 560 billion metres” #curiosity
Usain Bolt runs at 31mph which sounds good, but if he hits a child there’s a 40% chance they’ll die.
2.6 billion dollars later we get a black & white photo of dirt. Couldn’t we have just sent a hipster into the desert? #Curiosity#NASA
This Chick-fil-A scandal has got me worried. I want to go to Arby’s but I don’t know where they stand on the unrest in Syria.
Al Qaeda prisoners caught trying to tunnel out of Abu Ghraib. The giveaway was the burqa-clad Rita Hayworth poster.
The Higgs boson scientists must look at the Mars Curiosity scientists and feel the way the Jonas Bros felt about Bieber.
I can’t believe a probe just landed on Mars and it took me three tries to get a bottom sheet onto my bed.
I don’t have balls, but I imagine getting kicked in them feels a lot like switching your alarm clock back on the last night of vacation.
Walt could blow up a school while Jesse drown a box of puppies & somehow Skyler would still be my least favorite person on Breaking Bad.
I ordered food, so now I have to put on pants to greet the delivery guy. #firstworldproblems
Wikipedia’s servers are not working. So this is how they felt when the library at Alexandria burned.
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