Nicole Kidman has been opening up to the press lately about her relationship with her husband, and about her relationship with ex Tom Cruise. Though she rarely talks about her first marriage, she now says that she was painfully shy in those days, but that new husband Keith Urban has helped her come out of her shell.

Kidman says she has always felt uncomfortable on the red carpet, especially posing awkwardly for pictures, and she leaned heavily on Cruise in the early days of their marriage.

“In those early years, it was like, ‘I’m here and I’m clutching onto your arm and it all feels a little overwhelming and really strange,” she said.

Now, she says, she has a huge support system in Urban; the couple have been married six years.

“[Keith] just gave me confidence through just being very kind to me and understanding me, opening me up to trying things, my sexuality, those sort of things.”

In a recent interview, Kidman spoke candidly about marrying so young–at 23–and being thrust into the harsh spotlight that accompanies a star as big as Tom Cruise.

“I got married really fast and really young. But I don’t regret that because it got me Bella and Connor, and I did have a fantastic marriage for a long period. Then when it didn’t work out, I had to really dig deep and find my way through depression, but I have no regrets about all of it. It was all a part of growing up.”