Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Wow! RT @MittRomney “If we win this thing, I’m marrying like 6 more bitches.”
Who’s ready to ostracize some friends tomorrow with wildly impassioned and offensive political Facebook status updates?!?!
Even though it means he’s a serial killer, it’s nice when a guy has piercing blue eyes.
Breaking: Starbucks introduces 3 more coffees you’ll feel like a dick ordering.
I would like to publicly state my support for Some Sex Marriage.
The game I spent 99 cents on in the app store is now free. #FirstWorldProblems
John Cusack might play Rush Limbaugh in a movie. Is it called “Eat Anything”?
Election ending will be like closing a porn tab — instantly hate self for getting into it.
While I wait for my iPhone software to update, I think I’ll carve a complete chess set out of some rocks.
I liked The Walking Dead better when they were just hanging out on the farm, trying to figure out whose turn it was to do chores.
I think this election will ultimately boil down to a choice between Barack Obama & Mitt Romney.
I’ve never met a baby named Beverly.
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