Come on, guys. Think about something before you go all stage five freakout on Twitter. I know that’s too much to ask, but I’m still going to ask it.

Despite what you may have read, a “rising chorus” of Republicans in Congress led by Rand Paul are not suggesting that President Obama should resign because Beyonce reportedly lip-synced the national anthem (people are still debating it) at this week’s inauguration.

Yes, that headline is real and was published by a popular magazine. Yes, I understand that it may not seem that far-fetched, considering Congress these days. But the article was published in The New Yorker and was written by Twitter personality, satirist, and frequent New Yorker contributor Andy Borowitz (of the Borowitz Report).

So, it’s just a joke.

“By lip-synching the national anthem, Beyoncé has cast a dark cloud over the President’s second term,” said Sen. Rand Paul (R-Kentucky). “The only way President Obama can remove that cloud is by resigning from office at once.”

While many in the media have blamed Beyoncé for the lip-synching controversy, Mr. Paul said, “We must remember that this happened on President Obama’s watch.”

Funny, but just a piece of satire, people.

These people clearly need that told to them:

Want more? Just check here. Some people get it, but a disturbing amount don’t get it at all.

I just hope that some of these tweets are a satirical response to the satire. Oy.