Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
For previous daily tweets articles go here
Today the Twitterverse was buzzing about the f8 conference and Mark Zuckerberg’s announced changes to Facebook. We also learn an interesting stat about the satellite heading towards Earth and see how a call about “family matters” can be interpreted in multiple ways.
Enjoy!
@DannyDover
Danny DoverNew Facebook Timeline: This sounds oddly like writing my own obituary as an infographic… #timeline #f8
2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@Hadzilla
Jeffrey RaymondMy mom texted me “we need to discuss some family matters.”
She either saw the episode where Urkel turned into Stefan or she found my weed. 1 hour ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto
@meganamram
Megan AmramThere’s another episode of the GOP debate? Haven’t they canceled that show yet? 3 hours ago via Twitter for Android · powered by @socialditto
@JordyHamrick
JordanI’d like to thank guys flexing in their Facebook pictures for making this comedy thing very easy for me. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@alanajoy
ΛLΛNΛ JOYEvery single day, every word you say, every game you play, every night you stay: I’ll be watching you… #f8 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@JennyJohnsonHi5
Jenny JohnsonIf I hear an adult call their dad “daddy” I assume he or she had lots of sex with him growing up. 2 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto
@badbanana
Tim SiedellIf you’re wondering, there’s just a 1 in 21 trillion chance any satellite debris will hit that Flo lady from the Progressive commercials. 4 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@PimpBillClinton
Bill ClintonHurricane Hillary? This will be the first time she’s blown anything in 30 years. 4 hours ago via TweetCaster for iOS · powered by @socialditto
@alexblagg
Alex BlaggAmerica would be so much better if our leaders were half as inspiring as our Levi’s commercials. 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@joshuatopolsky
Joshua Topolsky#f8 is getting really emotional. 2 hours ago via Twitter for Mac · powered by @socialditto
@FirstWorldLife
First World LifeThe gap in volume levels between action scenes and dialogue in my movie is too wide. #FirstWorldProblems 17 hours ago via TT Commander · powered by @socialditto
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