Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Kim Kardashian wins best in show for her breed, Standard Blackman Retriever
A Pekingese named Malachy won Best In Show at Westminster. Malachy celebrated the win by having absolutely no idea what just happened.
Kate Upton is a Chris Berman slap and Matthew Berry emasculation away from being the new matron saint of the sports blogosphere.
Floyd Mayweather thinks Jeremy Lin is overrated, which is funny because Jeremy Lin has managed to be undefeated without ducking anybody.
Jeremy Lin is asian people’s The Wire.
If Jeremy Lin dunked on LeBron James while wearing a Yankees cap and then celebrated by Tebowing in front of Brett Favre would ESPN explode?
RIP Chris Brown? Twitter has killed more black people then Hurricane Katrina.
RIP Chris Brown is trending on twitter. Looks like everyone’s been reading, “The Secret.”
RIP Chris Brown? More people have died on twitter than Alderaan.
Condoms are like parents… they are there to protect you, but usually it’s more fun when they’re not around.
“Dave Mustaine Endorses Rick Santorum.” Pro-life, meet Megadeth.
I bet Rick Santorum is psyched to have the endorsement of a guy who got kicked out of Metallica for snorting too much cocaine
Maybe Dave Mustaine doesn’t know that Santorum also refers to a politician?
That empty parking spot turned out to be a Mini Cooper
Kinect would be more fun if you didn’t have to get off the couch.
Honestly, I’ve killed more people playing the Sims than Call of Duty.
It’s not so much that I had a great Valentines Day, it’s just knowing that so many people had a terrible one.