Axl Rose, National Grilled Cheese Day, and Mafia Mullets

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Axl Rose, National Grilled Cheese Day, and Mafia Mullets
Written by Josh Wolford

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Enjoy!

“I don’t even own a cheese.” – hipster on National Grilled Cheese Day(image) 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

If you have nothing nice to say that’s what YouTube and Huffington Post comments are for.(image) 38 minutes ago via Tweetbot for iOS ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Too bad Axl Rose won’t be at the HOF Induction cos I was looking forward to him making the ceremony start 4 hours late.(image) 5 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

charles manson is the susan lucci of parole hearings(image) 23 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

demi moore’s marriage to ashton kutcher makes a lot more sense when you know that bruce willis is a ghost the whole time.(image) 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Had a student ask me if the singer of Nickleback was Kurt Cobain. I failed the entire class and set them on fire.(image) 23 hours ago via Tweetbot for iOS ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Not having a job really is the best way for Lamar Odom to get in good with his in-laws.(image) 1 hour ago via TweetDeck ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

“Don’t Trust The B—- In Apartment 23” is going to be a really annoying Wheel of Fortune puzzle someday.(image) 3 hours ago via Favstar.FM ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

So the November election will come down to who the voters prefer, the guy who’s not Romney or the guy who’s not Obama.(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Today is National Grilled Cheese Day, because God forbid we went a full day without celebrating something stupid.(image) 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Until proven guilty, Zimmerman is just a gun-toting, failed, wannabe cop with a desperate need to feel like a hero. So let’s not judge.(image) 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Lets be real here, Axl Rose’s crazy confused denial letter to the rock HOF was spawned by an ill fated attempt to button his old kilt.(image) 22 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Saw a dude rocking a mafia mullet. Legitimate business in the front, shady operation in the back.(image) 13 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I just got a free iPod, but I already have an iPhone #firstworldproblems(image) 30 minutes ago via twitterfeed ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

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