Virgin Mary tree trunk? Yes, you read that correctly. A Virgin Mary tree trunk. Unless you’re a perverted soul who sees something strangely — and disturbingly — vaginal in the image embedded above, then, chances are, you’re looking directly at the Virgin Mary. Sure, it may seem like a knot in a tree to all you non-believers out there — it is, after all, a knot in a tree — but a lot of folks seem to think it’s a sign sent straight from the heavens above, and it’s causing people to flock to West New York, New Jersey to get a good look at the trunk.

“We want to build a monument,” explained Maria Baez, one of the first people to spot the image in the tree. “When I got here I saw her: she said ‘I’m the Virgin.’ I was speechless.”

When another woman, Carmen Lopez, attempted to alert the police and the town’s mayor about the mystical tree trunk and its supposed imagery, she was essentially told to hit the road. However, in order to protect the tree from nefarious evil-doers who would love nothing more than to chop it down, a protective metal barricade has been placed around the trunk. Additionally, a police cruiser sits nearby should anyone start acting a fool in front of Jesus’ mom.

Others, however, were not so quick to believe in the tree. “I’m a Catholic and I believe very much in the Virgin, but the picture in this knot is just a coincidence,” said Ed Venicio. “However, I believe that whether or not it’s real, the important thing is that it motivates people’s faith. It gets them to go back to church and remember that God exists.”

Now there’s an explanation I can get behind. Well said, Venicio.